But when tragedy strikes, Stacy is left to face her now uncertain future without Johnny. She tries to find a way to push past her grief and get on with her life. But how do you move forward when half of your soul has died?

When Stacy finally starts to pick up the pieces of her shattered heart, she finds that not everything is what it seems. Facing new revelations, she discovers secrets that lay dormant for four years, using the last gift Johnny gave her, the locket. Now, she finds these new secrets are putting her on a path towards joining Johnny herself.

The Locket

 6/30/11

   *I'd like to thank everyone who bought my book. Hopefully you enjoyed it.
   Have you ever wondered where Stacy and Derek ended up? Well, as a gift to my readers, here is a glimpse into Stacy's life today.

Thanks again and I hope you enjoy.
-C.

Four Years Later…

   The weather is turning—fall flailing behind and winter rolling in just over the horizon. I’m reluctant to admit this time of year always reminds me of Johnny.

   So many years have passed and he is in every thought and prayer. But along with those thoughts are new ones that extend into my now comfortable life with Derek and my unforeseen success as a criminal attorney.

   Life is good, but I can’t help but think about what might have been. What would my life be like had Johnny lived and our plans to marry and start a family came to fruition?

   Strange how hurtful and wonderful life can be.

   The park across from our Austin home is lovely this time of year. This is where I sit and talk to Johnny and often wonder where he is now. My head is full of questions today. My mind is full of worry and excitement all bundled together to create a mountain of nerves.

   I have yet to make it home where I know my husband is waiting for me, expectedly. But how can I tell him about my doubts? How can I look him in the eye and not voice my concern?

   “Tell me what to do,” I whispered aloud. “If this is what is meant to be, do I accept it or is my fear of losing everything I worked for just?”

   A breeze catches the branches of the trees and tosses my loose hair around my head. Across the way I can see a couple with their hands clasped together and deep inside there is an ancient ache that pulls me from this life and into another—into a life where these decisions would be easy as breathing.
   A life that never knew a beginning.

   I bundle the collar of my coat closer to my throat to avoid the cold wind that begins at twilight during this time of year. Around the street are houses ornamented with Halloween décor.

   When I was younger these things mattered to me. I can still remember the first night Johnny and I made love…Halloween. That memory still brings tears to my eyes, even now.

   Then there are other memories—our first dance, our first kiss, our plans for the future, how simply we fit together and how much I loved him—that pull at my reasoning and remind me of what I’ve lost.

   But in the midst of that pain is another life which I have grown accustomed to. A life with limitations, but reasonable ones. A life where I am loved with the same passion as I once was when I was a girl. A life I have lived happily these four years. This life is where I belong and I understand what my obligations are and how my heart, which is almost completely mended, is safe and almost whole in this place.

   A smile creases my lips at the thought of Derek and his warmth and beauty.

   The day we took our vows I made a promise to Johnny I would give my whole heart to my new husband. That I would stich the tears back together again so that he would have the best of me. I admit I haven’t completely fulfilled my promise, but I can feel it…I’m almost there.

   To my left is a small child who is dressed in pink with a thick purple jacket wrapped around her torso. She runs happily along the grassy plane of the park and catches her foot on the edge of the playground curb. When she falls, something inside jerks me forward and I want to comfort her. Behind her, a tall blonde woman smiles and lifts the child in her arms, swaying to and fro until she is no longer crying. Quickly she forgets about her fall and runs to one of three slides and tries desperately to climb up from the wrong end.

   Just like that and the worry, the fear is gone. Just like that she was able to forget that once upon a time, something awful happened to her.

   Here is my answer, staring at me through a simple scene of a mother who comforted her hurt child.

   I’ve moved past the guilt, the pain and the nightmares of what Adam did to me that day. Angie always told me that he was the crazy one and not me. Adam killed his brother, not me and until this very moment, I never understood exactly how much fear still lay beneath the surface.

   After law school, I took a job with the District Attorney’s office and I honestly take pleasure in putting criminals away. For a while I wondered if I belonged where they were going. I killed someone. I took a knife and made a conscious decision to end his life. No one knows what I did, but I do and it doesn’t make it any easier to live with.

   What choice did I have? I refused to run anymore. If he could make it out of prison once, he could easily do it again…right?

   I take a deep breath and rein it in. It’s over and there is nothing I can do to change that.

   I didn’t come here for a flashback. I came seeking answers and to have a private one-way conversation with Johnny. I tell him I hope he is doing well and that I still miss his light and spirit.

   But he knows that—he always has.

   My back aches a little as I walk across the street and into my house where my husband is—as expected—waiting for me to arrive.

   The moment our eyes meet I already know that everything is going to be alright. My fears and worries are now over because in this place, I can be anyone and anything.

   “Well?” he asks, eager.

   I shuffle towards him, laying my coat on the arm of our sofa. His smile is expectant and I feel a calm wash over me. Suddenly, I realize that my happiness has only been overshadowed by doubt and fear in my ability to do this. But here it is and I am grinning from ear to ear.

   “Congratulations,” I tell him. “You’re going to be a daddy.”